21st February, 2002. 3:38 am.
here i be at Mac's humble abode in Broklyn munchin on a samwich wit the following ingredients:
1. Shilo Farms ALL NATURAL "no salt added" Sprouted Five 5 Grain Bread
- Low Fat
- Cholesterol Free
- Sodium Free
- A Good Source of Fiber
- No chemical additives or preservatives
- Made with third party verified ORGANIC SPROUTED WHILE GRAINS
2. Follow Your Heart Original VEGENAISE Dressing & Sandwich Spread
- Best Taste (on blue ribbon)
- Egg Free
- No Cholesterol
- Dairy Free
- No Preservatives
3. Sliced Red Bell Peppers
4. Green Beans (the kind in a pod)
yup yup that is the contents of my sam-witch made here with the vegen contents of the fridge.. it was really good and i was surprised. i miss you kids so much and can't wait to come home, but fully love it here. As i sit here i just finished my eating and am drinkin H20 outa a Mason Jar ... it's delic.. let me see.. i heart working fully, love chillin wit kids around here, i miss ya dolls miss kero (bitch farie) and miss rorie (pants farie) and hanging with Mac here, and the kids at work totally rock my socks, i went to brunch with a chick named Gina today, we went to a vegiterian resturant in the East Village called Kate's Corner i had scrambled tofu and an unsasage pattie with toast.. we had a lot of fun.. i miss greaser boys standing around their cars at Aromas.. i miss their cars.. i miss driving.. it is awsome to not have to worry about who is the designated driver though, like when the like once or twice that we have thrown cation to the wind and ordered beers we can both drink with no question, cause of the subway. but i'll be ready soon to trade it back in for drivin 70 toward lake sonoma (ahhh those were the days in the prelude) with the georgeous vinyards and mountains and green souronding me.. i love it!!! lets see.. i have all too used to having crusty or otherwise guys asking for sex, whomever it's from.
"No I don't have any money and don't wanna have sex with you.... bye"
this one guy got all up in Jinxys face and said "I wanna make love to you" it was so funny, but he got way too far into personal space, he hangs around the 8th and 14th street subway station, i usually give him cupcakes or muffins or cheese cakes on my way home... he doesn't harrase me, i guess he knows that when i have something for him i'll give it to him.. he is always very appreciative, but i wish he'd stop saying "god bless you" thats like the big thing to say.. ahhh.... i loved talking to lily on the phone, we talked for like what 2 er 3 hours the other night, it was really nice i miss you more than anything baby,,, more than Aromas... that should tell you a lot (teee hee,, you know that you are way more important than Romas though..) so what else? i am working on replying to the lovely letters i have been recieving from people it makes my week.. and i love writting back, i dunno it's so much differant than email, it is more time consuming and costly (by like 32 cents er whatever) but more fun, so oh i am reading a fabulous book [another awsome part of the subway is that the time on there you are basically forcerd to read, write, listen to music (if your privallaged enough to be able to afford fucking batterys) or people watch] called WHERE THE GIRLS ARE Growing Up Femal with the Mass Media.. it's really cool, i am totally enjoying it, it has information about feminist stuff, and the author is a feminist but it's not like completely baised as sometimes people tend to do when they believe really strongly about something as she does, anywho i really like it and it gives me some insight into my momma's mind cause the author is about the same age as my mom and it's her experiences along with alot of other stuff, one of the big themes is how women their ages grew up with the media and society going back and forth between you can do anything you want.. and no you can't do that! you belong in the home.. and alot about gender roles.,. right now i am reading about how the feminist movement was working to change the strict line of what women are alowd to to and be and make it obviose to everyone how curvy that line is, how many different personalitys women were expected to have.. okay enough of that, if ya'll wanna read it i am sure you can .. so yeah.. life rocks, it is now 4:15 am and i have to be at work in 12 hours and 15 minuites which means it is farwell time since there are still cloves to be smoked and peeing to be done, eyeliner to scrub away, and a jinxy girl to chat with.. love and kisses to all and great heeping bounds of longing to be with you ! Lizzy (the gay farie.. *knock*knock* "excuse me sir, do you have any teen age sons?" *WHAPPP* "your gay!!") tee hee
boy's i've had crushes on/ supposedly had crushed on me, or actually been involved with, who "turned out" to be gay:
- erik mark
- i can't remember the others, i gotta ask lil for assistance...
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22nd January, 2002. 12:09 pm. My NAmes NOT FUCkeing WaRrEN!!!!!!!!!!!
WARNING WARNING: I AM GOING TO GO OFF NOW, IF UNINTRESTED PLEASE STOP READING AND I'LL BE SURE TO GLARE AT YOU LATER
holy fucking shit~~!!! you are not going to fuckng believe this!!!!!1 so jinx and i are sitting in Around The Clock and i see this guy come in, i look, think, look at jinx, look back and say "that guy looks like warren from Empire Records" and jinx says"... thats cause... (motion guy) it IS!!" fuckin christ!!!!!! so we are sitting there and all this shit,, i have never been one to be star stuck but i thought i was gunna die!! jinx is like quoten Empire left and right singin songs n shit and i thought i wwas gunna cry!! i am like shaking all this!!!!!! DAMN !!!! he is sittin at the bar and we are at one of the little bar table guys.. i keep lookin over at him, he and this chick talk and both have out there note books ( I'm Emo. Where's my notebook.) and i can't believe it.. i go and get a match book, of which i have like five from Around the Clock just to like go walk by him. SHIT!!!!!! then JInx has the amazing idea that i go over to the payphone when theres a break in there conversation and call Lily and have him say "my names not fuckin warren" on lilys answering machine, i was scared as hell and fully thought i couldn't do it, but then i thought, and knew if i didn't do something i would kick my ass forever, so he gets up to go to the bathroom adn she says go go now and i am so scared and go over and dial in all the bullshit for the phone card
and say an intro on lils machine and "say excuse me".. tap... "sorry ahh would you mind saying something on my friends awnsering machine?"
the way he looked at me i thought he was gunna be like fuck stupid fans get over it !!!! but then
he said "whadda want me to say?" and
i say feeling stupid "my names not fuckin warren." and
he's like "alright"
so i hand him the phone saying thank you an all that and he sits there on the phone looking confused, i was all "is it doing sumthin wierd err?? "
he told me that the thing wasn't working and
i was like "ahhh crap" adn
he hands it back and says sorry and
i was said oh it's ok, thanks so much fer trying, ahhhh, do you mind if i try again?" fuck i couldn't believe i had actually said that "i mean if you don't wanna its totally fine"
him:"no no i don't mind (turns to friend) do you mind?" friend doesn't mind..
me:"alright then i'm gunna try the guy again"
him:"alright" so i fiddle with the fucking phone card agian and jinx says that while i'm doing this he's like explaining to his friend whats going on, she'll tell, so the machine comes back on and i say a little thing on it and hand it to him, he sits there
i was like " oh it's on" and
he says like two fucking feet from my face "my names not fuckin warren" and gives it back when i get it it's just started doing it's little anamated thing and
i say "did it work" (he was still facing me)
he said "yeah i heard it beep" and
i said "after err before"
he says "right before"
and .. me:"fuck that means it just ended oh well don't worry about it that was rad"
him: " you wanna try again?"
me:"yeah that would be great" so i try the phone card thingy
him:"is it a long distance thing?"
me:"yeah it's my friend Lily in california, that's where i'm from"
him:"oh well you wanna use my cell, its like the same as a local call."
me:"yeah are you sure? that would be great."
him:" hand me the phone just dial the area code and number." (while i'm doing this) him:"you wanna say sumthing first?"
me:" i think i already got somthing on her machine so i think it'll be fine"
him:"ok." handed him the phone while ringing
me:"it's just a genaric message"
him:"alright... My Names not fucking Warren!! I'll be back and you'll be sorry!" (hangs up)
me:"thank you so much that was way awsome, do you want a beer or anything?"
him: "nah, i think she(referig to his friend) ordered me one but the bar tender is taking his time." (all not pissed off, just like matter a factly)
me:"you sure (he knods) ok"
him:"your from california?"
him:"so what are you doing out here?"
me:"just seeing if i can make it, ya know, get a job and stuff."
me:"i've been here about a month, i came out with my friend Jinx" (me pointing he looks nods er whatever i m not sure, and turns back)
him:"so how doya like it?"
me:"i love it, it's way fun."
him:(puts out is hand) My names Brandon"
me:"i'm lizzy, nice to meet you" (shaking hands)
him:"Lizzy, yeah, you too." i've stood up by now, at some point, i'm not sure when, not wanting to over impose, and
i said "well it was nice talking to you"
him:"yeah you too see ya around"
KKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i was feeling beat fucking red at this point!!! i couldn't even believe it!! holy crap!!!! i dunno i was dying so me with my hands all shaking and shit try to get out a clove adn light and all that dropped my pack on the floor, god he was sooooo nice on his cell phone!!! oh p.s. he was drinking Guinness!!!!!!!!! i smoked like half we talked and it was now late enough to come here which is what we were origonally doing there, gettin coffee and chillen till it was late enough, so i bussed our table said thanks to the bar tender we said bye to this chick we had chatted with, she came over to talk ta jinx bout her tatoos and i said agian which i was plannin on and jinx recomened (oh and the offering of a beer i would not have thought of, jinx mouthed it at me after like the what second, third time)
"thanks agian. way awesome(nice rad i dunno sumthing)" and patted his shoulder
he said "sure no problem" sumthing like that
and we were out in a minuite ererr two fucking screaming in the street "MY NAMES NOT FUCKING WARREN!!!!! I'LL BE BACK AND YOU'LL BE SORRY!!" eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee holy shit i called lils machine imediatally to tell her what the fuck was going on and to make it nice and clear that if that machine did not pick up and record i was personally, when i got home, goiing to take it out side and beat the fuck outta iit wiht at base ball bat!!!!!!! i got to hear him actually say it twice!!!! like a two feet from me we chatted he was soooo nice i coulden't even hang. but jinx said i looked all cool and casual... fuckin eeeeeeeeeelllllllllllll eeeeeeeeeeeeee
i did my best to reinact correctly, it's preatty word fer word but i am not exactly positive, i was atalking to warren from mother fuckin Empire Records!!!!!! i wasn't thinking bouts takin notes... oh my goddddddddddddd soooooooo rad!!!!!!!!eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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21st January, 2002. 9:06 pm. YIIIPPPPPPPPPYYYYYYYYY
Horay!! today was my first day at work, it was sooo rad!!! i got there an half an hour early cause i didn't know how long it would take to get there, and i didn't want to take any chances, but they didn't mind, i went in, and the first thing i did was frost cupcakes and put sprinkles on them for an hour and a half so rad! then Barbra trained me, it has a lot to learn amazing, the sweets are really good, i tried this badass cake and i get all the free drinks i want while i am working, and preatty much all the free slices of cake and cupcakes and all that!!! i can even make myself double mochacinnos!! and fuck how i miss them... i wanna write a whole bunch more but i am super tierd.. Jinx and i were supposed ta meet here about an hour ago, but my darling hasn't arived yet, hopefully yer still sleeping, that would be really good for you, with all the no sleeping guys!! so i am going to go home now, jinx hopefully you'll see me before you read this, cause that means yer still at home and wont have any trouble getting back home if ... whatever, but .. just in case, gimme a call and i'll trolly back down and chill.. (i don't know why trolly worked, it just does!! lily you understand right!!!????) and i have prezzies fer ya when i do see you next!!! ok kiddos, i shall write more about Magnolia's in my next entry guys,,, love ya'll and misss ya'll emensly!! that place hella rocks!!! eeeee work eeeee love my friends eeeee miss my friends boooooooo friends may come here eeeeeeeeeeee love life eeeeeeeeee
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20th January, 2002. 1:02 am.
i am getting tired, i think i shall see what ms Jinxy thinks about going home when she gets back... well guys and dolls, life is like a chair of bowlies (thanks to lilys refigerator guy) fer that, ahhh denied!! she wants ta stay fer like another hour or more, and so we shall seperate, go our seperate paths, because i am so fucking tired, and i don't want to have to be all draggin fer hanging out with the guys, i've been awake fer ahhhh 15 hours minus my little 10 minuite of questionable napish, do you ever do that where all of a sudden you are aware that you weren't aware? like you don't really think you slept, but you weren't exactly concious either, but if you think about it hard enough and fast enough you can sometimes recapture where it was your mind was, what it was pondering and can almost pin point the spot it went from concious to not because all of a sudden people have on orange sparkling jumpsuits sitting on a swing set while they are explaining to you how to frost a cupcake.. you know? like you were thinking about stuff and little could be scenes from days in the near future are running through then all of a sudden, orange jumpsuits.... well fuck, it's time for my depart, jinx is back from smoking and my sevices of "watching" her stuff is no longer needed. okayaly doakaly kisses much to me and you
"my dreams are languid and lawless, and everything bows to beauty when it is fierce and flawless"
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19th January, 2002. 11:27 pm. Day to Day n stuff
Fuckin 'ell!!! Today is kinda Sunday, i say kinda, in reference to the fact that the sleeping at the end of saturday, accompanied by the waking up into the sunday has not happened yet, but hopefully some of that kinda shiznik shall go down before meeting up with Rorie, Mac, and Kero (?)... that would be good to have the sleeping guys.. the point is that today is basically Sunday, and that means that tomorrow is Monday! and i get to go to work on Monday!! i am sooo fucking stoked. fer reals, i can't wait to have a scedual and get to go in and chat with co workers while frosting cupcakes!!! yes!!! cupcakes!! and hopefully getting free cupcakes to take home so i can lavish them on Jinxy and Mac (while she's around) :-: oh, Mac is this chick that Jinx made friends with at the Chelsea Hostle, she was escaping for the weekend cause she hates going to school and just the atmosphere she was in, she was attending a college in Washington and now she is moving here, she was going to rent the other available room in the apartment we rent in, but it's too far from her school that she is switching into. she seeems way rad! she came in tonight and we hung out, she is sleeping in our bed right now back at the apartment. She likes Ani and independent music and she does protests of corperate dumbasses and general capitalism bullshit, what else did jinx tell me? oh she is 19... okay yeah she is staying with us for a couple a days, while she looks for another place, ana -landladyguy- said she could say untill tuesday as a guest, but after that she has to pay rent of some kind, like fer a couple days, eerrr a week eerrrr whatever Mac wants to work out with her. okay back to the point :-: and Kero and Rorie (with the lavishing of the cupcake guys) and any other beautiful people that i come in contact with that is if i get to take home the day old err two day old err whatever cup cake guys!!!! i am soooo excited, i get to get dressed and get on the A train Down Town and get off at west forth and go to work and learn about making coffee and running the register and frosting cupcakes and selling brownies, and just general fun stuff that i am going to get to do there!!! yeah!!!! i am sooooooooo excited!!!!!!!! **** okay what else??? today i made some postcards, i love makeing the postcards!! cutting apart magazines and free newspapers and that strange depressing poetry book that i found on top a the trash can and making them into fun stuff that is funny or preatty or intresting or a good statement, or just neat... i love it!!! i made a great one with a dildo add and a depressing poem, but most people can't recieve things that are like not P.G. ratings, so i tink i may send it to Lily Guy care of the mail box at my mom's house, besides my mom will think it's preatty funny too.******** eeeeeeee i get to go to work eeeeeee ****** God our sleeping sceaduals just get stranger and stranger, lets see on Friday night we got around and got out of the house around midnight, i had been up since... like about 2pm i think, then we went to Around the Clock and hung there untill like 6 er 7 am then came over here to the internet cafe typed around, and caught the A home we got in at like 10am and i ate oatmeal and was asleep by probably 10:30am then i woke up at 3pm cause Mac called, i just missed it but listened to the voice mail which said we would be meeting her at Port Authority at 5pm so fer us to get there at 5 we would need to leave around 4 so i tried to wake up jinx which failed misserably since she hadn't slept in like 2 or 3 days and she had just managed to fall asleep like an hour before, so on the message Mac said she would be calling back, i started getting awake had some Oatmeal and got dressed and stuff, Jinx said when she called back she would tell her that we were sleeping and give her directions to the room, i thought it sounded harsh, but when Mac did call back it sounded as though she totally understood the insomnia kick and said she would see us soon (as told to me by Jinx) so that was settled, but i was already awake now 5 hours a sleep, i wrote and made postcard and talked to lily and maya and my moms awnsering machine. and smoked some cloves and wrote some more, then mac got in at like 6ish and we hung out fer awhile but she was tired and so she hit the hay and was asleep i am sure by 7, postcards... letter to grandparents... so getting tired lay down at 9:32pm, wake up at 9:48pm remembering to plug in my cell phone do so noticing that ms. mac has as i am guessing gone to the bathroom, she comes back right after i lay back down and is aranging some things near her bags, like doing stuff, jinx wakes up after about 10mins (unrelated to doing of things near bags) and we turn the lights back on and all wake up for a rootin tootin good time! we laugh around and after a time decide to go to the internet cafe a couple hours later jinx and i get outta the house and it's 2:30am thats our record as of yet not starting the day like as in leaving guy untill 2:30 am!!!SWEET!!!***** my time is about to run out, so i gotta post before it goes away... i am in such a _________- mood, like just felt like typing all that shit out, it can't be terrrably intresing, no matter, i had fun doing it!!!